Khemset explores: Cooperation and Communication in Competition
Everywhere you go, there you are.
In an attempt to make the best decisions and have the most success/win the most money at the poker table, we all naturally decide how to conceptualize our opponents and the situations we find ourselves in.
Some approach this by villainizing the opposition and, despite a cordial table demeanor, internalize feelings of disdain for the humans they are playing against. Perhaps you’ve done this - and if so, I’d like to present an alternative perspective that you might find worthwhile - and maybe even try on for size.
The author, scientist, and pioneer Gregg Braden has conducted research with Tibetan monks who are able to shift into high gamma brainwave states, among other unique brainwave states, consciously when they choose to do so. These states of being are associated with deeper levels of focus, more creativity, heightened longevity, increased cognitive function, resilience, clarity, and so on.
The reason these brainwave states matter is that, with regard to high gamma in particular, the key that unlocks the door of getting into this state of being is one of love, connection, and positivity, which underscores the need for heart & brain coherence in achieving these heightened states.
The heart and the brain synchronizing with one another maximizes the potential for the whole body system. This allows for an increase in efficacy and output in performance to occur.
It is intriguing to me that while it is expected to be edge-seeking as a poker player, this same nature or disposition to find ways to win can also be a springboard for how we learn about our humanity and grow our connection to ourselves and others, as opposed to simply reigning supreme over them in a game. I suppose this would upend the conventional idea of poker being zero-sum game, in the sense that learning and well being are an infinite game, despite the chips in poker being zero-sum.
While competition fuels the desire to find more alignment & clarity inside ourselves by way of the competitive endeavor, there is an inherent cooperation that we are well served to recognize - and it can serve as a catalyst for growth which reflects back to us where we are clear, or not, in our perceptions of ourselves and those around us.
The nature of cooperation in the midst of competition is that there is an unending implicit communication between each participant. These communications form the basis for how we interact with each other at all times - on and off the table, and are quite interesting to consider in terms of how our choices at the table are impacted. The masking of one’s true intentions at the table may be a virtue, while in life it may be a vice.
This communication, subtle as it may be, is what serves as a template for learning more about ourselves, others, and the strategies of the game. If we are willing to be open to let life usher in new ways to perceive and understand our experiences - a wealth of knowledge awaits us. Life is always speaking, it’s simply up to us to listen.
A practical situation I found myself in recently that exemplifies this is one where I found myself all-in with TT vs 88 deep in a tournament. I realized that I got excited by the prospect of possibly doubling up, seeing that my opponent had a significantly worse hand, and caught myself fantasizing about what might come next - instead of remaining present in the moment, content and at peace, accepting of whatever may come. It is this exact thought process that leads one towards instability and becoming unbalanced internally - or more easily said, incoherent.
I saw the flop come 567 and felt the feeling exacerbate by becoming further ungrounded in my perception of the situation, culminating in my opponent turning a straight and being subsequently eliminated.
My takeaway from this is that in reflecting on my experience, I saw how I had put the cart before the horse. There’s a certain element of planning where - if you double up you have different dynamics with different players, strategies change, ranges evolve, and so forth - but the way in which the feeling came over me was one of impulse, not one of measured care and discernment. Acceptance and awareness are the first steps to recognizing what is - without these we cannot change what we do not own.
I think it’s fascinating that while this is something I’ve experienced many times over in my career, the nature of poker and life more broadly is that it calls you to rise to the occasion every time. Having done something before doesn’t mean it will serve as a substitute for the next time you find yourself being challenged.
I believe that I am distinguished from my peers in that I take whatever is happening in each moment deeply to heart. I know that whatever is happening *must* happen - and I intended to ‘use it up’ accordingly.
Do I think that because my internal state of being was somewhat frenetic in this case that it caused me to lose this all-in? I lean towards yes, and I think that I can choose to attribute the reason that I lost to something which drew my attention towards an area of myself that can be improved upon. So in that sense, I see that the inaccuracy in my perception could be said to have led to the loss as a means to deliver an important message - not entirely, or solely, as a mechanical input/output for why the experience occurred. This is how I choose to use experiences which I don’t prefer, in a positive way, that I do prefer.
Wherever I go, there I am.
In the great Taoist text written by Zhuangzi, there is a story about a Butcher, Ding. The story goes that when cutting ox he was so skilled in his approach that his knife never dulled over a 19 year timeframe. He achieved this by his willingness to bend and not break, by accepting the ups and downs of life, remaining adaptable and flexible without resistance. The result is that he only puts his knife to use in places where there was already an ‘opening’, waiting for him to do so. Why fight an uphill battle if it’s not necessary?
The Taoist concept of ‘Yangsheng’ or ‘Nourishing Life’ is touched upon in this story. It is related to the concept of ‘Wu Wei’ and described as navigating the world with a deep intuitive ease. Wu Wei is seen as the after effect of flow, or ‘non-doing’, that one experiences after Yangsheng has been activated or cultivated.
In general during all-ins, I do a reasonable job of holding in my heart an eager curiosity to see what happens next while maintaining my focus on the present moment. The more I find myself putting up any sort of internal resistance, feeling anxiety or uncertainty, or expressing an attachment - win or lose, I lose. This is because that state of being is simply not conducive to success. It’s unpleasant by its very nature. And this most recent experience was a great reminder of just that.
Years ago, I created the screen name ‘PerfectSonata’. Although I was not aware of the great Butcher Ding at this time, I was aware of the fact that the possibility exists to find a flow in your experience and usher forth an experience of ease. I love to see each moment as an offering to produce the next ‘note’ which is harmonious and synchronized with the previous, which offers the opportunity to create just that - a perfect sonata.
Opening ourselves to life as it shows and guides us towards becoming more of our true selves by virtue of the unfolding of events that are placed in front of us ensures that we can learn & grow from any and all experiences we have.
For me, this is one of the most consistently profound aspects of poker - everywhere you go, there you are! The reflection that the game offers us to gain deeper insight may not always be pleasant and may require some diligence, but the opportunity is always there and the time spent introspecting will always be rewarding.
The more I come to the game with a childlike curiosity, willing to trust whatever happens to be in my highest & best interest, approaching it from a place of love for myself and others - the more I seem to make progress and find success when I have decoded and put into place the next infinite building block of self-realization.
Thanks for reading and happy high gamma life experiences to all those who partake in such things :-)
